if i can run in heels then i can drive
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
