you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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