i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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