how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Randomize
