Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize