What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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