from now on my penis is your penis
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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