we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
