The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
