dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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