how can u be prego again
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
