ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I deserve this hangover.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
