That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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