also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
