He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
