Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
