Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
