Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
