my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
pop tarts are not kleenex
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
