why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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