so that wasnt chicken after all
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
