apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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