and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
