So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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