I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
It's just like the Real World with babies
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
