In America we eat man semen.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Shame - the story of my life.
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