i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
