She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
