I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Randomize
