so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
