Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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