On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
