I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize