He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
