Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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