just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize