I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
