I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
FUCK WHALES
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
