Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
