So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize