i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize