i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
His nipple licking is glorious
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