We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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