I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize