it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
