I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Randomize
