And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
