I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
