She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
