After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
